Home › Senior Jokes › Archive for Old People Jokes › Page 3
Blog Archives


Ever think about this one? Why is it accepted to make jokes about old people? Isn’t it racism? The discernible, answer is, that the same way nobody gets insulted when people make jokes in their own society, [because they obviously don’t mean to be vicious or hurtful], when it comes to jokes about oldies, which we all hope to be one day, obviously nobody means to be degrading. So please revel in our hilarious collection of old people jokes.

Creative Commons License photo credit: jesuslizrd

It’s Never Too Late

Two oldies got engaged, and as they were strolling down the street excitedly planning there wedding they passed a drugstore. “Excuse me” the man said to the clerk, “Do you sell medicine for memory problems?” “Sure” replied the clerk “all kinds.” “How about for arthritis?” “Yup” replied the clerk. “Wheelchairs, walkers, adult diapers?” “Yeah”, replied the clerk, all kinds. “OK excellent” said the man “because we are getting married next month, and we want to use you as our Bridal Registry.” -Azi Deutch

 

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 3.1/5 (75 votes cast)

share me!

Posted in Long Jokes, Old People Jokes

Whoops!

I ran into a store leaving my elderly mother in the car. I was surprised when at the cashier I saw my mother there. What are you doing here I asked I left the car running? Don’t worry she said I locked the doors!

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 3.5/5 (30 votes cast)

share me!

Posted in Old People Jokes

Old… Older… Oldest

Reporter-So whats the best thing about being 100?

Old Lady-No peer pressure.

– Sylvia Shiner

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 2.9/5 (20 votes cast)

share me!

Posted in Old People Jokes
Advertisements

Memory Problems Joke

A few old couples used to get together to talk about life and to have a good time. One day one of the men, Harry, started talking about this fantastic restaurant he went to the other night with his wife. “Really?”, one of the men said, what’s it called? After thinking for a few seconds the Harry said, “what are those good smelling flowers called again?” “Do you mean a rose? the first man questioned. “Yes that’s it,” he exclaimed. Looking over at his wife he said, “Rose what’s that restaurant we went to the other night?”

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 3.9/5 (589 votes cast)

share me!

Posted in Good Jokes, Long Jokes, Old People Jokes

Can You Hear Me??????

An old man went to the Doctor complaining that his wife could barely hear. The Doctor suggested a test to find out the extent of the problem. “Stand far behind her and ask her a question, and then slowly move up and see how far away you are when she first responds.” The old man excited to finally be working on a solution for the problem, runs home and sees his wife preparing supper. ” Honey” the man asks standing around 20 feet away “whats for supper?” After receiving no response he tried it again 15 feet away, and again no response. Then again at 10 feet away and again no response. Finally he was 5 feet away “honey whats for supper?”
She replies “For the fourth time it’s lasagna!”

 

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 4.2/5 (1116 votes cast)

share me!

Posted in Funny Speech Openers, Good Jokes, Husband Jokes, Long Jokes, Marriage Jokes, Old People Jokes

Where Did I put My Teeth?

Two old ladies were discussing their husbands over tea. “I wish that my Robert would stop biting his nails. It gets me very upset.
“My Calvin used to do the same thing,” the older woman replied. “But I broke him of the habit.”
“How?” the first women asked
“I hid his teeth.”

=

VN:F [1.9.22_1171]
Rating: 4.1/5 (52 votes cast)

share me!

Posted in Old People Jokes Tagged with:
Advertisements

Categories