As a first grade teacher, I often hear from my students things going on in their family. Harry’s mother was expecting, and naturally Harry was very excited about it. When one day Harry stopped talking about it I was concerned and questioned him why. “Well”, Harry said, “my mother told me I could feel the baby moving in her stomach, I thing she ate it!”
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A Word From The Wise Joke
When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, “I’m not sure…” “Look in your underwear, Grandma,” he advised, “mine says I’m 4 to 6.”
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Posted in Cute Jokes, Little Johnny Jokes
The Missing Boots
As part of my job as a preschool teacher I have to help the children put on their coats and boots. One day when school was over and the children were getting ready to leave, one child came over to me in tears “my boots are missing” she wailed. “they are in the corner” I said pointing to her boots. “Those are not mine!” she said, stamping her foot, “MINE HAD SNOW ON THEM!”
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Kids And Fish Joke
For our daughters 6th birthday we bought her a fish. We couldn’t help laughing when on the way she announced “the fish’s name is Sparingly.” “How do you know?” I asked “look” she responded “it says “feed sparingly 3 times daily.”
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Playing Doctor Joke
My child Mike, was playing doctor with his friend Jim. “I’m so sick” said my son, “Can you please take a look at me.” “Sure” said Jim taking out his toy stethoscope, after a few seconds of listening closely to his heart, he said sadly, “Oh Mike, you have a broken arm!
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Posted in Cute Jokes, Little Johnny Jokes
Mean Boss Joke
The CEO of a large company was walking to the cafeteria along with two of his secretaries. Upon tripping on a bottle, a genie appeared and asked the threesome if they would like to each make a wish.
The first secretary excitedly exclaimed, “I wish I was on a beach in a tropical island!” Immediately her wish was granted.
The next secretary proclaimed, “I wish I was on a tour of France!” Immediately her wish too, was granted.
Being that it was now his turn to make a wish the CEO exclaimed “I want the two of them back in their offices right after lunch!”
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Kids Fears Joke
I live in Canada, a plane ride away from my family, so I was very excited to inform my twin 3 year olds that we were going to go on a plane to see my family. It was after a few days that it struck me that they seemed nervous about it. After talking it over with them I finally figured out the problem. They thought they would each have to fly on a separate plane by themselves. How else would we all fit into one of those tiny planes that fly in the sky?
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The Cheaper Solution
A lady went to a psychiatrist complaining of a terrible phobia. “Every time I lay down on my bed I get this terrible fear that there is something underneath. “Wow” responded the psychiatrist “I’ve never heard of such a phobia, but like all phobias it can be treated, but it will likely take around 20 sessions.” “OK” responded the lady “how much is each session?” “Oh it’s just $80 a session, but trust me it’s well worth it.” When the lady didn’t come back to the psychiatrist he gave the lady a call. “How come I didn’t hear from you? He asked.” “Well” responded the lady “when I came home and told my husband about the cost he thought he would save some money, he just cut the legs off the bed!”
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Posted in Long Jokes, Phobia Jokes
Cell Phone Joke
A man who found a cell phone walked over to a meteorologist and said “sir I think this is yours.” “Why do you think so?” asked the meteorologist “Well sir it says 20 missed calls!”
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Posted in Weather Jokes
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