Birthday Invitation:
What? You are invited to Cathy’s birthday party.
Where? 1424 Maple Dr. (you will need to be buzzed in, so dial our number with your nose and you will then be buzzed in. Once, you’re in the building, press the button for the elevator with your nose. Then press floor number 12 with your nose. We are the door on the left hand side.)
Can’t wait to see you!
P.S. You will be pushing with your nose, because your hands will be too busy holding the presents.
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Birthday Invitation Joke
Posted in Birthday Jokes
Cannibal Eating Joke
Two Cannibals were eating a clown. One Cannibal Turned to the other
and asked, “Does This taste a bit funny to you?”
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Posted in Cannibal Jokes
Back Seat Driver Joke
My daughter sure showed me what a back seat driver I am!  On our way to the mall today, I stopped short at a red light causing the car to jolt.  As soon as I jerked my 3 year old in the back seat hollered Daaaaave.  Not sure why she had called my husband’s name, I asked her why she had said what she did.  “That’s what you say when someone stops like that”, she innocently replied.
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Posted in Cute Jokes, Little Johnny Jokes
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Stock Market Joke
Q. What’s the best way to make a small fortune in the stock market?
A. Start off with a big one!
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Posted in Economy Jokes
Fries Joke
Man – “I would like some fries, please.
Blonde at the counter – “Ok……………………… and would you like some fries with that?”
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Posted in Blonde Jokes, Food Jokes
Double Portion Joke
Waiting hungrily on the lunch line, I eyed the hamburgers being served. Upon reaching the front of the line I asked, “excuse me, can I please have two burgers.†“You’ll get the same as everybody else,†the lady said in a bored voice. After hungrily eating my lunch, I walked to the garbage to throw out my plate, but I accidentally dropped my lunch tray in the garbage along with it. While I was digging in the garbage for my tray I felt a tap on my shoulder. “I’m sorry sonny†the lady said in a horror-stricken voice, “ here is another burger.â€
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Posted in Food Jokes
Late Joke
I was upset but not too surprised when I saw flashing lights in my rearview mirror. “I’m terribly sorry officer†I said “I was just trying to make it to a meeting on time.†“That’s a shame†the officer said upon handing me my ticket, “what time is the meeting called for?†“Three o’clock†I said. The officer looked at his watch, “you could probably still make it if you hurry up!â€
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Posted in Police Jokes
Travel Joke
An older couple were walking on a beach when the husband tripped over a bottle and a genie came out. “You can each have one wish,” said the genie. The wife made her wish first “I would like to travel around the world, with my husband,”. Suddenly there appeared in her hand two tickets for travel around the world. Now it was the husbands turn, “Well” said the husband, with a naughty look on his face “I wish I can have a younger companion,” . The words were barely out of his mouth when poof, he aged 20 years!
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Posted in Genie Jokes
Happy Birthday Joke
After much convincing from my husband, I finally agreed to call an old family friend to sing her happy birthday. It was only after I finished singing, that the voice at the other end of the line informed me, that it was the wrong number.
“Oh I’m sorry” I said, embarrassed. “It’s ok”, the voice said “you can use all of the practice you can get!”
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Posted in Birthday Jokes
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